Mental Patient Escapes to Istanbul

Kazantip, Ukraine

“Are you crazy?!” It’s not so much a question as a statement you’d make to someone who’s wearing his Bellview Mental Hospital sweat suit, while you listen to a radio report about an escaped mental patient, while watching him use a Chihuahua as a towel to dry himself from the fierce rainstorm he's hallucinating. I mean, for Christ's sake, at least use a bigger dog man!  

“Booked a ticket to Istanbul yesterday. All accommodations here sold out from tomorrow night on.”

“Well Jesus, stay with us already. Making the trek all the way out here, and leaving right before opening night would be like wining and dining a super-model for a month, and getting up to leave during foreplay,” comes his response.

Since he puts it that way ... I certainly don't want the derisive scorn from my mates associated with making a such an unmanly mistake! That plus the fact that he’s already on the phone with Bellview authorities trying to return them their rightful property ... I readily agree to his offer.

I had met a Turkish girl in Odessa who seemed quite excited to show me around Istanbul, but right now I am seriously considering missing my flight, something I’ve never done. It's unlikely I’ll ever be out all this way to experience this party again.

I return late from my meet-up with the Russian Models and receive a text telling me the offer of accommodations is void, that they are truly unable to fit any more people into their overstuffed room here in Kazantip.

Internet has been down all day, not an uncommon occurrence out here, and I have no place to stay tomorrow, and I have nothing prepared for Istanbul, and no way to book. 

I wake-up a few hours later. Still no Internet. I have little choice, I get in a cab, drive two hours to the airport. Convince the VIP Lounge to let me use their Internet. I log on and there’s a Facebook message from Gamze (Turkish girl) stating that she’ll pick me up from the airport, “write me back to confirm you’ll be here,” I excitedly start to reply, when my lap-top crashes.

Since May the hard drive has told me it was planning to self-destruct. Every time I have logged on I get the warning, “Hard Drive Failure Imminent,” and now apparently was as good a time as any to follow through on the threat.

My computer won’t come back to life. Great, now I am going to show up in Istanbul with no computer, no place to stay, and Gamze refreshing her Facebook page, thinking me a rude, monstrous putz for not even bothering to reply.

I tinker with my computer as long as I can, zero success, race downstairs to my plane, becoming the last passenger to board. 

Bye-bye Kazantip

Istanbul
I'm flying by the seat of my pants yet again, an hour and a half later landing at Atta-Turk Airport. I think to myself I leave too much to fate, that a little preparation would go a long way. Now I have wasted all this time, energy, and money getting to a city I wasn’t inordinately fond of last time I was here, and the reason that I came likely won’t even want to speak to me. Stupid Internet. Stupid computer. Stupid me. Maybe I do belong in Bellview.

With all these thoughts circulating my mind, I take a few conscious deep breaths, hoping to delay my own imminent hard drive failure. I have weaved my way through the long passport control line, and walk out into Big Bad Istanbul, trying to predict which scam the taxi driver is going to try to pull on me ---

“Richard!!!” comes the voice.

I turn to my right and look. There’s Gamze! Oh my God, she came to the airport! What if I hadn’t come?! Now I'm excited. Who cares about organization. Who cares about preparation. Everything works out for me. I live charmed life. I give her a big hug and dance around for a second. Happy feet!
As we walk away together, a commotion ensues behind us. I turn around and see some burly authorities with "Bellview" stenciled on the back of their uniforms affixing a straight jacket onto a struggling male they've pinned to the ground who's yelling, "You've got the wrong guy! You've got the wrong guy!!"


It's a near certainty he's right.    

Mental patient rides lion in Istanbul

Russian Models Like American Eyes (Kazantip, Ukraine)

The sun takes a bow and disappears over the horizon as the citizens of Kazantip Nation applaud. As we approach the end of the week long lull between the Sports Games, and "opening night," things have started to pick-up, with more and more people arriving daily, including a perfectly formed golden haired being who's decided to descend from Mount Olympus and join us.

Aphrodite

I see Aphrodite and her cute friend at a bar on the way out. I walk up and say hello. The Goddess of beauty speaks some English, her mortal name Vera. She introduces me to Svetlana, half Russian, half Korean, both models journeying here from Moscow for the festivities. Svetlana understands some English, but speaks almost none. I get to know them as much as I can, but the conversation is stilted, the language barrier making communication difficult as it has for me the entire week.  

Svetlana

The next night, my last in the Z, I am dancing in the Marlboro Lounge (yes, smoking is alive and well in Europe.) A pretty Gypsy dances by, casting her spell on me, my eyes following her, enjoying watching her groove -- 
"AYE! AY! What the fuck are you looking at?!" her boyfriend yells at me in Russian, understandable in any language.
"Allright dude, chill, it's Kazantip."
But he doesn't chill, he goes on yelling, posturing. I open my palms to the ground and press down, trying to to calm him, but this volcano keeps erupting, spewing fatal amounts of egoic possessiveness all around him.
I know if it was me I would have smiled, possibly said, "I'm glad you appreciate."
Now it's his fourth breath, and he's still erupting, screaming, threatening. The volcano is attracting attention over the loud music. I'm in awe of the massive size of this guy's frail ego. So this is where the Hitlers of the world come from. He finally pipes down, and I scoot a little away, trying to continue dancing, but I'm looking over my shoulder to see if he's going to come and try sucker punch me or something. It's time to go.

I walk down the beach, watching people dance, kiss, and enjoy themselves, yet I'm letting my thoughts and fears about some idiot take me out of the present moment. Is this really how I want to leave Kazantip?

I climb atop a dome shaped bar, enjoying the laser light show while I look out at the sea, the unceasing luminosity of the stars once again washing away my sense of self, my self-importance. I meditate there for a good half-hour, before a group of four joins me, toasting the night in celebration. They pour me a glass of champagne.
My thoughts have shifted from worried and disturbed, to silence, and the radiant love and appreciation of the moment that comes with it. Now I am ready to leave.

As I walk towards the exit I see Vera and Svetlana in the same bar as yesterday. Unhesitatingly I approach, smile, and say hello. I'm just there, present, enjoying their company.
Fifteen minutes pass, Vera looks at me, and speaks to Svetlana in English for my benefit. "He has American Eyes, doesn't he?"
"I do?" My eyes have been called green, shiny, cat, bright, but this is the first time I've heard a nationality ascribed to them. "What are American Eyes?"

American Eyes?

"Look at you," answers Aphrodite, "You're always smiling, your eyes are shiny, it's like you have no problems, how do you it? Are you always like this?"
"I'm in Kazantip, talking to two beautiful girls, on a warm night, under a starlit sky. How could there be any problems Now?"
"Are you always this happy?"
"I was being threatened a half hour ago, I wasn't all that happy ... but that was then, this is Now. Why should I let that affect me and poison my interactions with you?"
"Do you have such a great family or something?"
"My family is very small, I rarely see them."
"Maybe it's that you don't have to see your family that makes you so happy."
"No, I feel joy, cause I am here, now, speaking to you. It's been a process for me, and I'm not always like this, but what problems exist for you right now? Not in your mind. When you let all the problems that exist in your mind go, there's nothing left but the beauty of this moment."
"Eckhart Tolle," she says, quantifying it so the mind can understand, make sense of it, make it less threatening to the ego, "I'm reading that book in Russian."
"Great, and the power comes in being able to apply it. It's still work in progress for me."

Vera, writer, Svetlana

I sit there in silence, I have little else to say. My heart is open, and I realize that despite being from Mount Olympus, she's human, with her own doubts and insecurities. She believes herself to be mortal. Her body, yes, her soul, her consciousness, no.
I think about my ex-girlfriend Maria, from the same heights of gorgeous, yet how much anguish still existed inside her. People would see her, and be struck by her outward appearance, yet never take the time to find out how she felt inside, and how her own ego would convince her that her past affected the now, and how often the present moment would be poisoned by her fears and judgements.
She's no longer with us, by her own hand. I think it about it and feel sadness well through me. I allow that to pass, breathe in deeply, look at Vera and Svetlana, and feel into the beauty all around me, the same that is inside.
They smile at me. When anyone allows themselves to be fully present, when our bodies and hearts vibrate with the same frequency of the Universal Love, people and beings around you unconsciously recognize this, and it help awakens, if only for a moment, the same vibratory frequency inside of them.
American Eyes are just a symptom of this energy. Describe it as you like, divine love, God, even Eyes Americano, those words are just a sign post pointing to the ultimate truth. The Buddhists have a saying, "The finger pointing to the moon, is not the moon."
One day mankind might reach the moon. I'm glad to be able to reach it, if only on occasion. Anybody that wishes to join, is more than welcome.

Sex, Drugs, Electronica, and a Bliss Attack in Kazantip

Kazantip
The party began almost twenty years ago when some wind surfers at a summer competition started a bonfire on the beach and added music. The celebration grew and grew, day by day, summer after summer, until today it is the premiere party in Eastern Europe, lasting from the end of July to almost September.
The party consists of two parts, one being the recently added sports games, an eight day event, the former Soviet Bloc's answer to the American X-Games; the second being a huge rave, where Kazantip Nation attracts in excess of 10,000 youth a night.
There's a very small subset of Eastern Europeans that can afford the $250 for the month long KaZantip ViZa (everything here has a "Z") , not to mention additional money for lodgings, transport, food, alcohol, drugs, and the vacation time needed to make the long journey out to the middle of nowhere. Why do they make the trek? Aside of probably the nicest, least polluted beach on the Black Sea, it's like pilgrimage for youth, the Mecca of raves, something you can always say, "Yeah I did that."
Many compare being here to Burning Man in the States, or the party in Ibiza. Over the years this two square kilometer "nation" has really built up some infrastructure- bars, restaurants, sculptures, a skyway, and stadiums that line the beach. It's actually quite impressive.
Many of the creations in Kazantip are modeled after drawings drawn-up by Soviet engineers who imagined what life would be like on the moon; from the rocket ship below-

nest of eggs atop spaceship in Kazantip

to the Star Wars like moon like residences- Kazantip

(check out this video of the scene in Kazantip- from day to night)

Drugs-
A plethora of drugs exist. I was warned not to consume any drinks that didn't come straight from a bartender as they could very likely be spiked, namely with Speed.
Fortunately, I never have to worry about being offered drugs, I know I'm not cool enough. (plus I don't speak Russian)

kazantip Bar on "skyway"

Sex
Boobs. You'll see lots of boobs on the sand here. I told you it's a nice a beach, right? It's clothing optional in the Z.

yes please

However, due to the huge expense associated with Kazantip, the majority of girls that arrive are attached. According to Dmtryo, very few Ukrainian women can afford to make it here on their own, but that doesn't mean hooking up is unlikely.
In my last post, I told you I was viciously attacked by mosquitoes at dusk, and while purchasing my pass to the sports game portion of the party ($25) I was taking my revenge on the little vampires resting on the walls, swatting about six of them while i waited for my ViZa to be created. I turned around and exchanged eye contact with a blond girl who was looking at me horrified.
"What are you doing?"
"Killing vampires."
My ViZa is ready so I walk away, probably looking like a weirdo in her eyes.

She sees me on the dance floor the next night. "Hey, you're the American that was killing mosquitoes!"
"Maybe."
"Can I talk to you?" she asks.
Great, now I have to explain my Hitler like actions towards these blood sucking parasites. She takes me aside, and sits down with me, but thankfully insects are the last thing on her mind.
She's a 25 year old Russian diplomat, hence the good English, recently divorced, and is here to party cause she's "too young to stop drinking and having sex." And that's what she's here to do ...
  

Flying bicycle- Kazantip

Electronica
24 hours a day, disc jockey's are playing electronic music in every bar on the beach. Aren't grooving to one DJ, walk twenty seconds, you'll find a different flavor. Unlike city clubs, even in the evenings, you'll find very little male/female grinding, most people are trance dancing by themselves, and there are some really excellent dancers here. I don't happen to be among them, but I love it when I allow music to take over my body, and I just let go. When thoughts cease, the dance of pure expression take place.

Bliss
I'm trying to decide whether to stay for the rave portion of the party, and pay the $250 for the new ViZa. Outside the ticket office, I run into Kate, a Russian girl. She and her friends are leaving in a couple days, and can't afford the fee. She strikes up a conversation with me and invites me to hang out with them. When people invite me to do something fun, I'm usually a Yes Man.

Me, Kate, and two Russian friends

We go and get some Koniak at the local store, and head to a neighboring beach. No English is spoken aside of Kate, who speaks poorly anyways, so I'm just enjoying their company. We're the only ones there and it's well after midnight. The sky here is clear, and outside of the lights coming from the party area, the entire region is shrouded in darkness for fifty miles in any direction.
I have never seen so many stars. It's magnificent. 

Stars in the night sky above Kazantip (Big Dipper)

As I sit there with my new friends, looking at the night sky, and its glowing stars, I think about how I am created of the same energy that created the dynamic lights that illuminate the cosmos. Their size, the billions of miles of distance, their age, and me, a tiny speck of a microcosm of this vast expanse of space, yet in total unification. There is no separation, I feel part of a greater whole.
Tears roll down my eyes, a release of whatever negativity might have been in me, the problems of my mind dissolving as the purifying gratitude of existence washes over me. Some people have panic attacks, I get bliss attacks. Right Now, is holy. I need nothing, there is only deep peace and love. Kate looks over at me. I smile. "I see the Universe in your eyes,"
I whisper back, "You're no different than me, are you?"

The Center of the Middle of Nowhere- The Clean and Beautiful Crimean Peninsula, Ukraine

We get off the train in Simperofol, and take a bus towards Kazantip. The moment we're out of the terminal, the driver stops and picks up a new passenger in what is certainly a pre-arranged plan to bypass the full fare, a way for the driver to augment his meager income. Along the way, he picks up several more paying hitchhikers- common in the Ukraine.

There's almost no civilization over the two hour ride, just vast expanses of flat, largely barren ground. It's hot outside, so I purchase three ice creams at a stop, and try to gift them to my new friends Viktoriia and Dmytro, but they refuse the sugar. I'm not eating three of these ...
I hand one off to the cliche fat guy sitting next to them, and start scanning for another worthy candidate. I spot a small boy 50 feet away whom I walk to. He shakes his head at the offer.
What? Seriously?
The ice cream cost a dollar, and given that Ukrainians earn $500 a month, this likely isn't an everyday treat. I return and relate my surprise to Dmytro who opens his eyes wide, and warns that someone is going to call the cops on me. I guess it's been awhile since I wasn't allowed to take candy from a stranger. I sit down for a moment and ponder what to do with my rapidly melting gift.
My answer approaches, it's the little boy nodding his head excitedly, extending his hand; he smiles enthusiastically as he walks away with his treat.
Minutes later, like any narcissist, I check in on my work and observe the boy sharing the ice cream with his sister. I smile at his parents who nod back. There will be no police line-up today.

Kazantip- not exactly on the map
At last we arrive in Kazantip, located on the Black Sea in the Crimean Peninsula of the Ukraine, in the center of the middle of nowhere. Surrounding Kazantip (which technically is just a large gated party area on the beach) are two tiny towns and then a vast void of nothingness for a fifty mile plus radius.
The woman who owns the small apartment building we're staying in, its tiny rooms essentially just a bed and bathroom, explains that all money is made during the summer months, the rest of the year the area is a complete ghost town. She makes enough during the summer, she tells me, to be able to to hibernate through the winter.
The rooms rent for $25-$35 a night (depending on if you have AC) and go up in price when the party in Kazantip really kicks into gear. They'll also be happy to cook for you, and meals are very reasonably priced, the food fresh, grown locally, and all organic; farmers here can't afford pesticides. Thank God right.

(I'm also introduced to a Ukrainian beverage called "kvass." Learn a little about in this video.)

The people here are much friendlier than Kiev. The waitress who served me was absolutely elated when I taught her how to say, "Enjoy your meal," in English. Every time she served me over my week long stay she would proudly use the phrase and walk away with a huge smile on her face.


(just see how desolate my surroundings are, as I explore the area)

Communistic Storefront
The grocery store of the neighboring town is managed like a relic of Communist Times, a model of complete inefficiency. You wait in line, and when you finally make to the front, you tell the clerks what it is you desire, they go and get it for you, then come back to the counter and ring it up. Five people in line ahead of me buying less than five items each, and I waited 15 minutes just to purchase a bottle of water. Only one line of course. In fairness, they don't call it "the express."
The only logical reason for this set-up that I could think is how common theft appears to be in the Ukraine, and this is an attempt by the shop to combat it.
I'll tell you this, leave something out in the Ukraine, kiss it good-bye. Left a bottle of water atop my suitcase lugging it around Simerafopol, come back two minutes later, I'm going thirsty. Leave my flip-flops beside some other shoes while I run on the beach, come back, and have to walk barefoot back to my lodgings.

My strategy for purchasing anything in the Ukraine was to put whatever I was buying on the counter, or point to what I needed, let them tell me in Ukrainian how much I owed, nod my head as if I understood, pull some money out of my pocket and pray they gave correct change. At no point should you open your mouth. The moment they realize you're American, here comes the surcharge.

Clean and Beautiful
The weather is warm, and the sea refreshing, the water an almost tropical blue and surprisingly clean and translucent. Being out in the middle of nowhere, there is zero pollution and the sky is crystal clear. This isn't a beach of Southern Thailand, but it's far nicer than I expected.

The Black Sea in Crimea- Kazantip is clean!

Mozzie Magnet
I go at sundown to meditate on the beach, which is normally a great plan in Los Angeles, but not the best idea here. Within two minutes I've been viciously attacked, and am left with what I consider to be massive injuries- twelve mosquito bites. I beat Usain Bolt back to the motel.
My whole body is in utter despair, I don't have enough hands to scratch where I need. It gnaws at my mind which I feel like tearing out of my skull so I won't feel the burning itching sensation over every square inch of my body. There is absolutely no relief from this. I'm in the center of the middle of nowhere, surrounded by an army of mosquitoes, and no way out. I wonder what drew me all the way out here begin with. I must be insane.
Dmytro sees me scratching. "Don't you know how active mosquitoes here are at dusk? Everyone hides til it gets dark. Only an idiot goes to the beach at this hour. Didn't you wonder why you were the only one out there?" He leaves shaking his head.
I think about what he's said and look at the bright side. At least 'idiot' is a big step above insanity. I feel a little relieved. An encouraging word can do wonders now and then. Thanks Dmytro!

Mosquito magnet, Dmytro (sunburnt), Viktoriia

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