PA: “So what was the rest of Holland like?”
Dutch house out in the countryside |
PA: “Something took you further?”
not many forests in Holland, we'll call this a wooded area |
PA: “Lucky you.”
one of millions of rivers in Holland, I meditated on the right bank |
PA: “Sounds nice.”
RB: On the way back, I found a grocery store and decided I would stock-up on supplies. They didn’t offer to bag any of my items, so I figured it was self-service, and grabbed some plastic. The guy behind me tried to tell me that I had to pay for the bag, but the girl working the check-out stand waived at him, non verbally telling him not to worry about it. The guy wasn’t being a stickler or anything, I felt he was really trying to help. All of a sudden I found myself in a conversation with him and two other Dutch (also known as Hollish) men. We spoke for at least an hour, about topics ranging from drugs, sports, to why Hollish men are so damned tall. The 6’5” guy, who I figured would have some basis for an opinion, unfortunately didn’t offer much conviction behind his theory of dairy consumption. I found them all tremendously warm and nice. One of them invited me to a festival that was in town that evening. I decided that I would go back to Alkmaar, and possibly journey to the ocean, the next day as well.”
PA: “How did that turn out?”
RB: “Wonderful. I returned to Alkmaar by train, a good fifteen minutes from Zaan Daan, rented a bike, and began my 20km ride to the beach.”
PA: “How was the countryside?”
a cow intensive field |
PA: “So did you reach the beach?”
RB: “Indeed I did.”
PA: “Is it okay if I ask you a few questions about what transpired there, as there are numerous eyewitnesses?
RB: “Go ahead.”
PA: “Did you go out onto the sand?”
RB: “Of course.”
PA: “And do you know the name of the body of water touching the beach?”
RB: “The North Sea.”
PA: “The North Sea?”
RB: “The North Sea.”
PA: “And then what happened?”
RB: “I took off my shirt, and took what I had in pockets out.”
PA: “And someone commented on it?”
RB: “A woman told me I was insane. That the water was too cold. That I risked catching pnemonia.”
PA: “Did you jump in anyways?”
RB: “Are you kidding me?? I’d have to be the dumbest person in the world to actually jump in after that warning! What type of idiot do you take me for?”
PA: “So was it cold?”
moments before hypothermia set-in |
I urge all of you to visit Holland. It is a wonderful place, and in my opinion, for all the reasons I have mentioned here, “The Most Advanced Country In The World.” And the jury agrees.
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