Thursday, December 1, 2011

Lindsey Pooka- Crazy Companion in Laos

Lindsey Pooka, once South Dakota’s resident, was evicted from her land by the Federal Government for “failure to upkeep her property,” paving the way for the Department of the Interior to finally annex the area, enabling them to sell it to the Chinese in adherence to the Republican “Excess State” program aimed at efficiency and reduction of the national debt. (The Feds originally wanted 100 billion dollars for the land, but the Chinese bargained them down to $7.89. I still think we got the better end of the deal)
“It’s about streamlining operations, making government smaller and more efficient,” proudly states the program’s mastermind, Rico Hanes, “We see great synergy in this sale.”
“Do you even know what synergy means?” I reply dubiously.
Rico pauses, looks at me, anger and disbelief in his voice, “You're bad mouthing synergy! What are you, Communist? I’m calling immigration and having your ass deported.”
Which is how I ended up here on the other side of the world here in Laos. I put the blame squarely on Lindsey.
Miss Lindsey Pooka
“Are you really so messy and filthy the government has to kick you out of your stupid state that simply exemplifies American excess?” I ask.
“You try cleaning and keeping rats out of 77,121 square miles and we’ll see how well you do,” she retorts. 
Lindsey, as nice as she is, is certifiably nuts. She claims there are were "other residents" in the state, all “super important people.” Their names George, Tom, Abe, and Teddy.
“Let me guess, they live on Mount Rushmore?”
“How’d you know?!" she asks shocked, then adds, "I really miss them. All such great conversationalists.”
Lindsey's good friends- George, Tom, Teddy, and Abe.
So this is whom I’m about to go on trek with through the mountains around Luang Prabang. Who I will have to trust with my life climbing these steep hills ... it's not an unfair question to ask: Which of us is crazier?
Unequivocally me, cause I should know better, but Lindsey is giving me a real run for my money.


  1. Hi !

    My name is Kevin, I just lauched with two other fellow backpackers a website named

    I first saw your blog on the Thorntree travel writing section. I went to your blog out of curiosity and I felt like I had to contact you.

    When I read some your post on Luangprabang night market I just thought that we could absolutely do something together (You have amazing pictures of Laos and this would make one hell of a guide).

    I don't know if you heard about but it is basically a free travel writer community where everybody can create a guide and share it for free, download it etc...

    I would really like to take your guide as "guide of the week" on backpackmojo if you wanted to create one, and then you could make a PDF version of your guide available to your readers for free. We are also working on a system that enables you to sell a printed version of all your guide to finance your trips. We want to help backpackers fund their travels as much as possible.

    We could also get you some visits to your blog by refering to your blog on your profile/guide (I really want to have your Laos pictures on our Homepage :D) !

    If you feel interested in the project, if you want to write a guide, or even just happen to stop in Paris for a day we would be happy to have a coffee with you !

    Anyway, don't hesitate to contact me for anything, we have had a few nice articles on blogs but we need more to create an amazing community !

    Good luck with your travel writing man !

  2. hey Kev, I would be happy to have a coffee with you in Paris.
    I am ambivalent about all these free travel guides and such. On one hand I like to con tribute, on the other hand, it takes sooo much time and work to write these things that it is nice to be compensated monetarily, even slightly.
    I would love of course to have a link on backpackmojo, and I saw some of the pics you had of Indonesia, and really liked the one on the "cover" ... a couple days since I looked at it. Feel free to email me at richbirecki2000 at yahoo ...
    Over and out, let me know how this could all be made mutually beneficial.


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